This morning we have got a call from one of our close relative and this person started pouring all the challenges and complaints life presented to her. Atlast when we were about to finish the call with her, I heard her saying "I feel relieved as I have shared my problems with you". Incidentally it struck me with the recent article I read on the same line.
In reality I am not convinced that a problem shared is a problem halved. If anything it has become magnified as we started bearing the load on how we could help her solving the problem. That is the problem you can have, in case you are the one amongst the believer of "Problem shared is problem halved" concept!!
As soon as you have problems that OTHERS fear then you risk being swept along by their fears and anxieties which are not necessarily an accurate reflection of your own. Pre-conceived notions of why the problem occurred in the first place often leads to you being bombarded with, albeit well-intentioned, but nevertheless inappropriate advice.
Not only that, a recent survey states that 96% of people believe in this concept but scientific approach stated it had ZERO or NO impact to the original problem that was shared and it was sheer waste of time!! Shocked? read further
Researchers Emmanuelle Zech and Bernard Rimé have written clearly their investigation on their book called "Handbook of Bereavement Research" with included two groups of people being investigated in an independent study on effects on emotional recovery and perceived benefits.
One group were asked to discuss the most depressing problem/traumatic incidents that they have faced in their life to his other subject partner for about a week where as the other group is asked to discuss their typical day happenings for about a week to their subject partner.
Indeed, the person who discussed the traumatic incidents/depressing problem/negative experiences felt mentally relieved as per his/her statement immediately after the tests. But the consequent psychological questionnaire results revealed a different story. The conclusion is that talking about negative experiences to a sympathetic but UNTRAINED individual is sheer waste of time as it does NOT do any single good to the both the parties!!
They found another technique which could really help in resolving your problems by sharing. It is called "Expressive Writing". Now, you may ask the same question I have asked, "how come the feelings expressed orally does NOT have zero OR negative impacts but the expressive writing could bring in significant benefits?"
By the way, you want to read more about this research article here
Let us see tomorrow!!
In reality I am not convinced that a problem shared is a problem halved. If anything it has become magnified as we started bearing the load on how we could help her solving the problem. That is the problem you can have, in case you are the one amongst the believer of "Problem shared is problem halved" concept!!
As soon as you have problems that OTHERS fear then you risk being swept along by their fears and anxieties which are not necessarily an accurate reflection of your own. Pre-conceived notions of why the problem occurred in the first place often leads to you being bombarded with, albeit well-intentioned, but nevertheless inappropriate advice.
Not only that, a recent survey states that 96% of people believe in this concept but scientific approach stated it had ZERO or NO impact to the original problem that was shared and it was sheer waste of time!! Shocked? read further
Researchers Emmanuelle Zech and Bernard Rimé have written clearly their investigation on their book called "Handbook of Bereavement Research" with included two groups of people being investigated in an independent study on effects on emotional recovery and perceived benefits.
One group were asked to discuss the most depressing problem/traumatic incidents that they have faced in their life to his other subject partner for about a week where as the other group is asked to discuss their typical day happenings for about a week to their subject partner.
Indeed, the person who discussed the traumatic incidents/depressing problem/negative experiences felt mentally relieved as per his/her statement immediately after the tests. But the consequent psychological questionnaire results revealed a different story. The conclusion is that talking about negative experiences to a sympathetic but UNTRAINED individual is sheer waste of time as it does NOT do any single good to the both the parties!!
They found another technique which could really help in resolving your problems by sharing. It is called "Expressive Writing". Now, you may ask the same question I have asked, "how come the feelings expressed orally does NOT have zero OR negative impacts but the expressive writing could bring in significant benefits?"
By the way, you want to read more about this research article here
Let us see tomorrow!!
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